The New MableTV

What's in a Tag?

2008-04-29T13:36:00.005+10:00

Forgive my suaku-ness but I don't have any idea what a tag is. I only remembered about the tag by Jo after reading someone else's blog and her tag.

GillieBeans kindly explained to me as like: "the game tag. You tag someone and they have to do what you did so in this case, someone tagged Jo with that list of questions so she answered it then she tags someone else and that person is supposed to answer the same set of questions."
If I got it wrong, don't look at me.

10 Things That Makes Me Happy (in no specific order):
1. A newly found hobby - baking! I surprised myself because I swore that I'd leave baking to Michelle. When we were growing up, she would make all these yummy cakes and cookies but totally sucked in cooking. So as not to compete with an expert, I decided to draw attention to myself by being good in something else. It's all very Freudian.

Anyway, if it wasn't for Chic I wouldn't have experimented with food-blogging. It's given me a new joy to combine old passions i.e. food styling, photography and cooking.

2. My family. I cannot even express in mere words how gloriously fortunate I am to be in this brilliantly, nutty family. My parents are incredibly folks who did their best in bringing me and my siblings up. It was hard for them - two struggling young adults to feed three monstrous children (the youngest being a brat) with limited resources. And now that Michelle and Mike have their own family, the Roots have extended itself to their partners and babies. My family is nothing short of extraordinary.

3. I say this with a blushing maiden's coyness. Mr. G makes me very happy. In fact, today marks our twelve months benchmark. That's the longest relationship I've ever had but it still feels like the first day. He is a kind man with a heart of gold. And I'm incredibly grateful that he's in my life. Thank you Mr. G for making this monkee so happy.

4. Friends. People like Jo, Carrie, Gi, Koons, Lyn, Yanti, Ai Hoon... and so, so many more have enriched my life with laughter, tears, love and shared embarrassments. Without them, I am a dull person. They make me laugh at myself; they keep me insane; they bring out the worst in me and that's the essence of good friendship. If I ever forget myself, this people would be the first to slap me back in place. Well, close.

5. Long walks. I love lone, silent walks in the botanics or anywhere with lots of trees. There is a sort of peace that settles in the crazy mind and quietens it. Huuushh.... There's plenty of thinking to be done, but later. Later.

6. Books. Books are like doors to meeting interesting people and ideas, experiencing journeys and adventures that aren't yours but somehow becomes yours. It's like having intellectual conversations with authors that you have little chance of meeting and yet, still grow in depth, mind and spirit. To me, words are magical, beautiful and invisible creatures.

7. Mathematics. I actually find them quite pleasurable. I used to detest them. But I don't so much now. As long as it doesn't become too complicated like Advanced Mathematics of Engineering. It's strange but many things I find to be of bad taste (in the same category with leek and umbrellas) as a child are slowly becoming manageable.

8. Oh how can I even forget this? Photography. I am happy when I'm snappy.

9. Traveling and connecting with people. My recent solo visit to Cambodia was an amazing adventure where I met even more amazing people. Having gone alone forced me to do things I wouldn't normally have done; making conversation with strangers are quite often daunting for me (yes, even I can be shy) but once crossed the barrier it becomes wonderfully rewarding. Culture is always an eye-opening experience.

10. Finally. I was breaking into cold sweat. Uhm....
Freedom. Freedom makes me happy. As much as I complain of not having a job, I enjoy having the time to do the things I like doing anytime I want. There's often conflict between security and freedom of which I'm learning how to bridge... however, I am fortunate to be free.
I have good health - therefore, I am free from sickness.
I have good family - therefore, I am free from family-related stress.
I have good friends - therefore, I always have support and love.
I have a good partner - therefore, I am always loved and cared for.
I have my sanity - therefore, I am always free to be responsible over my actions and choices.

Well. There you go. Tagged.

However, this tag will end here. Merely because, I don't know who I can pass this on to.

Love, your friend,
Mable

Food Project

2008-04-29T10:49:00.003+10:00

I started a food blog with two other food lovers and experimenters. Check it out, you might want to add a thing or two yourself.

Things That Goes Bump - 2004

2008-01-30T03:32:00.000+11:00

I'm not adding these to fill the space. I reckon as old as they are, these writings were rather well-thought of reflections. I can still relate to them now and I see them as reminders. Enjoy.

"You Are Riding a Horse in Unfamiliar, Beautiful Terrain.
You were told that you would have to jump a tall stone fence (a substantial obstacle or big-deal project) five miles down the road (later in life). Distracted by the scenery (life) you forget about the fence, until it looms suddenly in front of you. You don't feel ready to jump (take a risk). You cannot imagine going over that fence and surviving! This is a big stretch for you! Yet, it symbolizes something you want to do, so you feel conflicted (fear vs. wanting). Perhaps you momentarily panic or try to stop. However, the horse (your inner power) has been trained to jump and before you can pull on the reigns, you find yourself flying through the air. The horse is doing it for you. You land perfectly. The horse is fine and so are you--but you feel Shaky."
[courtesy of astrologyzone.com/forecasts/eclipse.html]

Things That Goes Bump
**********************

I Used To Be Afraid of the Dark. But I discovered the science of light. I was afraid of driving. But I learnt the mechanics of pedal pushing and gear shifting. I am now a road tyrant. The art of fear is never about an object or a person or a place. Fear is a psychological temperament that we fool ourselves about, or rather, I, fool myself.

And I don’t take that sort of nonsense (fear) easily. Life is far too short to be feared. So the one great fear I have would be myself. Yes, the same person who warrants fear is the same person that is typing this.

Me: the only person who can tell me what I can and cannot do.

I would float my way to North Pole on an iceberg. I would fall in love with the man that I have always wanted to say ‘hello’ to. I would jump into a pool in a pink florescent bikini. But me – the very thing I fear of – tells me I cannot. So I sit and wished I could. Did I tell you I was the first person who invented the roller coaster? No, really. No kidding. I have all the blueprints up here (points to head). I have a sit in it every now and then. My invention is better than any (of which I shall not name). It swings through the whole grill of emotions: pain, misery, anger and self-pity.

Self-inflicted heart attack would make quite a medical discovery.

I like to think I become uncomfortable when I am comfortable in life. I hit panic when I realized that these days, I am settling for discomfort. Fear grips me in the gut, my instinct tells me to make a run for it, and my blood is rushing so fast to my brain I cannot steady myself. When I see myself succumbing to complacency, I feel like I’m watching my soul wither.

GREAT FEAR #1: Not living life to the fullest.
Settling is not my idea of a good life. No, I do not want to want to graduate from university so that I could find a job, pay the taxpayer, meet a man, borne his babies, wash his skit marks, feed his children, have my heart broken because that bastard found a new (younger) sex buddy while I die in an alien foreign place without ever having my dreams realized. I have that fear, of dying without a name, a face, or even as a mere whisper. I do not want to live without living. Breathe without breathing. Think without thinking.

My greatest fear would be living less. Having no freedom to be a person or the power to think, speak or, develop as an individual is like snuffing the light out of a burning candle. It is easy to believe life as a birdcage. A gilded aviary of beautiful birds with dazzling feathers. Hmm… perfect. Not only do we have no place to fly (what’s the point of having wings?), we’re also birdbrains.

GREAT FEAR #2: To live without loving.
It comes as simple as reaching out to another living person and enriching it for an unknown better. Imagine that having born with a brain, movable parts and sensory devices, how much good we can all do. But how we seldom do good. We do the selfish. We avoid the beggar. We snub the garbage men. We curse the DBKL workers. We ignore, we dispense, we avoid, we turn a deaf ear and a blind eye to cries of help. My second to greatest fear is to be yet another drone in this beautiful, enchanting world. No matter how charming, a person without compassion is like someone without a soul. The person next to me is as human as I am, how hard is it to show a little kindness?

Apparently, I fear all these without knowing why. I just know that someday when I wake up from bed, I want to recognize that face that looks into the mirror. I want to be able to say: "Hullo! You’re a free spirit! Isn't that a beautiful thing?" I do not plan to be bounded by society; blinded by money or fame; afraid because the little voice in me says it is impossible. I want to have the freedom to go wherever I wish to go. Not fearing whats, hows, whens, wheres, whos. The question is not what I fear, or who I fear. It’s merely an internal twister that blocks me from achieving what I truly feel I’m capable of. We are all born for greatness. The only person we need to prove to sometimes is ourselves.

I Discovered Today - 2005

2008-01-30T03:07:00.000+11:00

Was I ever this wise? I must be to have written this. Wonder where it all went?

I Discovered Today
*******************
Forget about not having – but instead, concentrate on what you have,
Bitterness comes from the inability to count your blessings. Do not look at the lacking but instead turn to your blessings.

Comparisons are destructive. Look to above.

Alone
I do not need to surround myself with people’s approval in order to make a decision.
I live alone to face the consequences and I cannot expect to constantly live in approvals of people who do not make me matter.

Time
Time makes a person. Live life like you never had. You have that time on your hands – so use it wisely. Learn a language. Learn a skill. Discover a new side of you that you denied yourself all these years because you didn’t have the time. You have the time card so play it well. Now you make time to fulfill all that you want for yourself.

Work the minimal to gain the maximum. This is the time for your self to build a new self.

What to do with time alone.
Meditate on your strength.
Work time alone for your self to concentrate on character building. Meditation will give you some clarity on your purpose. Understand your strengths and weaknesses. Work on them both.

Exercise. Take your self else where on a bicycle, in the pool, jogging. It gives you a feeling that you’re moving on when you think that you’re not.

Talking, sharing, guiding is an opening to enriching your life. Share with the unfortunate, talk with the lonely, guiding the slightly lost gives you more that money can buy. And it runs on zero risk.

The Coffee Story - 2001

2008-01-30T02:54:00.000+11:00

THIS is a classic. Gi, Chic and Yanti might know this one. I had to edit some of it because it was crazy ramblings (of course) and it didn't quite make sense. It still probably doesn't but I like to remind myself the wisdom of youth holds. Enjoy.

The Coffee Story
*******************

I had coffee. And you can imagine what sort of effect it has on me. Just million and million reactors in my body buzzing about. Everything wants to talk at the same time. I'm sharp, I feel as though I could understand the world if I have to.

Today, was pretty special. Aha, of course I wont' tell why, although I think it's guessable. I feel alive, and free. Just think, everything in your mind is finally clear of rubbish, and you just feel madly content. If there's such a thing, man, I wonder what they mix in the drinks at Coffee Bean.

I haven't felt this high since... since that day I got drunk on caffeine months ago.
So who says caffeine is bad for you? I feel as though I never want to grow old. Never. Because growing old would mean making mistakes and changing into adults. I don't like adults, they don't have anymore innocence or a sense of humor about life. All they think is work, indecency, money, sex, pleasure, temptation and themselves. I want a life that is simply simple, without unnecessary emotional baggage to carry, things like : who’s' going to love me, when am I going to get rich, what my kids will turn out, am I going to get robbed the next time I go out.

It's pathetic! I'll spend the rest of my life being a worry wart! Then I forget why the sky is blue, or how it is to smile my widest. I like being innocent! I enjoy being idealistic. I love my life as it is. I love being able to laugh aloud in public, making a complete fool of myself without caring who thinks I’m insane, or how I should act. Laughing isn't fun when you can’t share it loud and proud with everyone. Its happiness, why feel ashamed? It's meant to be contagious.

I want to be able to walk in the rain without worrying that I’ll be sick. I want to be free to act and speak without restrain or to behave like a ‘mature’ adult -- whatever that means to shut you up and forget that you ever had sense of humor.

I don't want to keep and upper stiff lip. Idealism allows the world to have a little color to Her cheeks without having to care about death, sickness and suffering. One thing for sure, there will ALWAYS be death, sickness and suffering (and of course a whole lot more). The thing is, what are we going to do about it? We could get A) desperately depressed about it, or B) make the dying, the sick and the suffering a little happier by making them FEEL better.

I want to be able to help people feel better. That's me.

And this is a coffee story. :)

By: Mable Tan
"MablePiggymakcikTAnkumansapo" :P

Note: That's why I stick to cocoa or tea these days...

Day 2 : Part I

2008-01-25T00:08:00.000+11:00

8 January 2008
Boddhi Tree Del Gusto, Phnom Penh, Cambodia

Last night, I slept with my tripod within reach. The fact that I didn’t have a door to my room eventually had me convinced that it’s a little crazy (I’m crazy). What the hell am I doing alone in a third-world country without a door to my hotel room?! Am I a walking disaster waiting to happen? Idealist? Not this morning, nu-uh.

Did I mention that roaming doesn’t work on my mobile phone?

So yes, I’m cut out from the outside world. Alone. Without television, a phone, a radio, a companion and guts. I need some really strong coffee this morning.

I got dressed and climbed down the ladder and ordered breakfast. As I munched on some deliciously soft crusty baguette I felt a little better. The hotel staffs were friendly and ask me how I slept (fine thanks, I lied). Vuthy asked what I’d be doing for the day and I said that I’ll like to go to LCDI – the school that I meant to visit.

Interestingly enough Vuthy, or ‘Fourteen’ – a nickname he was given during his schooldays because of his hockey jersey – was a former student and volunteered to take me there. If I could wait for him after his shift that day? He asked with a smile.

Oh why not?

He’s cute.

To fill in the time, I walked to the Russian market. On the way and carefully avoiding the genocide museum, I walked into a wat – or, a Buddhist temple – and was stopped by the stench of urine. I later realised that everywhere was a toilet if you had a penis. So when you see a man up a wall, please do yourself some service and look away.

You can’t miss the market. It’s huge. First I walked through the fresh market and came upon this black strange-looking catfish. Placed in a shallow basket, I first thought they were dead until I saw one jumped out from the basket and onto the dirt floor crawling its way through throngs of slippers. I was horror-struck! What kind of fish does that? The fish monger casually picked it up with a plastic bag and put it into the basket.

(Apparently this was a common thing as I saw more attempted escapees)

The Russian market was great if you’re a shopper. You’ll find everything you need and don’t need in here. Shoes, clothes, rubies, CDs, crickets, ancient wartime trinkets, fried frogs, preserved cockles – you get the picture. I managed to get a pair of Puma (USD$10), Birkenstocks (USD$5) and three scarves (USD$4.50). I liked a few a little too much so I thought that’s a good indication that it was time to go.

I don’t think one can ever get use to this heat (sorry, just me then). Though this place, the Boddhi Tree Del Gusto is like a little piece of heaven. Beyond the walls is dust and motordups. Inside, the tiniest space is embraced by trees, plants and flowers.

Sitting under the shade in a hidden corner, I made the mistake of being too friendly.
I had a new friend. Black and ugly, it adopted me as Mom (it jumped on my chest and started sucking or licking – whatever). It looked more like a bat than a cat, so I called the evil thing ‘Bat Cat’. Damn the bloody tropics, I spy a gecko.

With nothing left to do, I ordered a beer with lunch. I spent a few lazy lethargic moments in The Attic before deciding that I needed to talk to someone. I itch to connect with another human being. Bats and geckoes are really not my type of intellectual stimulation. Solitary confinement is too cruel.

I thought I tried my luck with an Asian girl who seemed friendly enough (it’s all about calculated risk). I came up with some absurd words (which almost sounded like a pick-up line) and Gabby must have picked up on my desperation. We hit it off instantly. Her companion, Denis (pronounced as ‘Dennis’) is a French-Canadian from Montreal and both, thankfully, likes their laughter loud. They’ve been in Cambodia for six to twelve months and I found out that Father Denis enjoy his beers just like he enjoys his vocation.

It was an absolutely delight. We talked about our beliefs, faiths, thoughts and ideas and it seemed we had so much in common. We ‘flocked’ for the rest of the afternoon.

Gabby, who by profession a counsellor, decided that life was more meaningful to serve, shared her experiences as a missionary in Cambodia. She told me how nothing gets out or comes in through the local post system. Stamps from letters are re-sold by clerks when postmarks are deliberately left un-stamped. Officials and members of the military are known to be corrupted. Lands are sold off without the original owners’ consent or even knowledge so much so many families are left homeless. The poor becomes poorer, the rich, richer. So like almost every country in South-East Asia, it is infested with economic cancer and inequality in human rights.

The Attic

Here at Last: The First Step

2008-01-24T21:36:00.000+11:00

January 7 2008
Phnom Penh, Cambodia

It’s hard to describe Cambodia on a first meeting basis. Nothing seems to fit. Guess we have to screw first impressions and keep it about lasting ones.

Travel Tip #1: Be a Suicidal Jay Walker!
That’s what I’ll say. Crossing the road is like deciding if you should eat donkeys’ tongue or alligators’ balls. You have to keep a sharp eye on the right moment. Wait, what am I saying? What ‘right moment’? There’s a freaking motorbike in every direction I turn. I learn that you have to take a leap of faith here. Cross and hope that the next five bloody motorcycles don’t run into you.

There are three men on a motorbike; do they make the sits longer in this part of the world? Never mind they’ve never heard of helmets or active sweat glands – its cheap to get around. You might risk a limb or two but that’s alright as well. It’s no use getting worked up. You end up nowhere – literally.

Left with nothing to do on the first day but wander along the riverfront, it’s almost a heart-breaking sight. Children as young as six or seven of age roam the streets to beg for money or sell tourists books (from Paulo Coelho to James Redfield, Lonely Planet and of course, The Killing Fields). If you’re not careful, like me, you’ll have a case of sympathy overflow and end up with two books and 10 postcards hoping that the money will go to food or education. The cynics will scoff at that but good thing I’m an idealist.

The children speak relatively good English. They’re also very small and suspiciously underfed. How does one walk away? (Oh, but we do) A 14-year-old girl, Shrey, spoke like an experienced business woman as she tries to sell me (another) book. As I shamelessly haggle for a price, I asked her how does one do a book business in Phnom Penh?

Most young entrepreneurs buy their books from a dealer at a bookstore and pay for it in advance. They then sell their books hoping for a profit of 2000 or 4000 rial (USD$0.50 to USD$1). Some sell to feed their families, some to pay for school fees, some perhaps we’re better of not knowing (if you’re an Idealist like me).

The more I walked down the street, the less I liked what I saw. Young mothers begging with her children, a baby diaper-less lying on the pavement, covered with dirt and exposed to fumes from passing vehicles; foreigners with their young Cambodian girlfriends. An all too-familiar scene in a cynic mind, only this time, it’s real life.

It wasn’t frightening and I never felt an ounce threatened but I was saddened by what I saw. I knew that it was inevitable in a country so devastated by war and a history of Communism – poverty and prostitution would be prominent.

We are all really one – the same skin, flesh, blood and guts. I am not separated from the girl who sells her books to tourists, the mother who begs to feed her children, the hot flushed farang with his attractive Cambodian escort. Humanity serves for all – unfortunately, she serves with different spoons. I wished life could be different for all of us – better, safer, kinder, more loving.

Hot, tired and had enough for the night, I took a motodup back to the hotel. Safely back in my little attic room (simply furnished with a mattress, a mosquito net, a fan and some floor cushions) I sit and contemplate about my first night in Phnom Penh.

Life here is simple. It may not have much, but I feel safe. It must mean something. There was a sort of honesty here. Poor as the people may be, they weren’t threatening. I felt that there was a sacred trust here. It may be a false sense of security but I guess that’s all I have for now.

12 Months Later...

2007-07-05T20:17:00.000+10:00

It's been a roller coaster month. Especially in my funny head. And I think myself silly sometimes....

I've been away from home for a year now. Well, not counting that I was back for a month in January. The words 'reflect' and 'meditation' keep appearing in my daily conversations with people (from them, not me). And perhaps I should take it as a sign that I must take time to pause and seek solitary space to go into deep thoughts.

In the last 12 months, I have just as many ups as I have downs and I'm grateful for every single thing that have turned up in my life.

I came into this country with nothing more than two suitcase and an old friend. With that, things have grown to him being a really good and reliable mate, a whitey house mate, an online business, new friends, an education in the stock market and a really good partner I can count on in sickness and in health. Life may have its down moments, but the ups have certainly compensated those experiences.

I made it this far and I know I can go further. There is much still for me to learn. Each time I get hit by a breakdown, I think to myself that I've been through bigger humps and bumps, so, this, I can handle.

I'm sticking my foot into the fountain, my toes are raisin soaked, and I'm enjoying every moment of it.

My Brain Works!

2007-06-15T12:56:00.000+10:00

There is a line in The Science of Getting Rich by Wallace D. Wattles that says, “The poor do not need charity; they need inspiration”.

The question is not should we stop being charitable?

Instead, we should be asking: do we need inspiration?

For most part of our lives, we have been educated not to win but to merely survive. Our minds have been programmed for years and years to think ‘in-the-box’ so much so we live life half-baked, passionless and poor. Is that really all to life: to sit in the stands and thirst for more? To watch the rich get richer? And we become poorer?

No.

Life has never planned it for us that way.

We did.

‘Poverty is not the getting of pictures of poverty into your mind’, said Mr. Wattles, it is ‘getting pictures of wealth into the minds of the poor.’ So simply, by increasing our faith and purpose to be rich, only then will our poverty be reduced.

I believe in the development of the most powerful tool mankind ever possessed – the brain. The grey matter we’ve long ignored and left unexercised. Our brain is a machine far greater, far more powerful than we know.

Knowledge is Power and Power is Wealth. Wisdom is an amazing mechanism to propel one from the pits into the heights of abundance. So feed your brains, energize it with books, DVDs, seminars, videos. Read, listen, challenge and empower yourselves with enlightening resources (soon available at BrainWorks Central).

Believe that life is made to be enjoyed. Live a life so unimaginable and so great that we become unstoppable! Live it with Power so that our children’s children will continue to be touched by the essence of our Greatness.

When we increase our knowledge, we can. We can.

Do You Like Your Insides?

2007-06-14T12:32:00.000+10:00

One of the turning points in my life, and one of the most important principles I have ever learned, is the Law of Correspondence. The Law of Correspondence goes back to 3000 years before Christ, and it says: "As within is the same as without." It says your outer world is a reflection of your inner world. Or as we say today: "Where ever you go there you are."

This is one of the great truths of all of human history. This is the basis of all religion, of all metaphysics, all psychiatry, psychology, philosophy. It says that if you can change your inner world; if you can change what is going on inside your mind, then you can dramatically change what is going on, on the outside. There is no other way. Your outer world "mirror" expresses your thoughts, feelings, hopes, goals, dreams and so on.

But let me get back to what this Law of Correspondence says... that your relationships, your health, your income, every part of your life merely reflects on a one-to-one basis back to you the way you think. Everything you have in your life you have attracted to yourself because of the person you are. You can change the aspects of your life because you can change the person that you are. William James of Harvard in 1905 said, "The greatest revolution of my generation is the discovery that the average person, by changing their attitudes of mind, can change the outer aspect of their mind."

But the flip side is there is no other way. We cannot change out external world except by changing our internal world, and you have 100% total control over your internal world. As a result, you have total control over your future destiny. You can become anything that you really, really want to become if you simply change what you think on the inside, to be completely in harmony with what you want to enjoy on the outside. You cannot be angry, frustrated and ignorant on the inside and have a successful, happy affluent life on the outside. But if you are fully integrated internally, your outer world will change. I promise you before this course is over you will begin to see the profound changes in your external world. Because in this course you will change because your thinking will change, and as the result other things will change in the "mirror."

The world is full of people who go to the "mirror" of life and they don't like their reflection so they pound the mirror. They try to change the mirror. They're frustrated; they curse the mirror, which is the equivalent to trying to change the external world, instead of going to work on yourself. So when you look the "mirror" use it to put the Law of Correspondence to work for you. Look at what is in your "mirror" that you don't want to see and then work to change the way you think internally, and watch your outer world change and become what you truly want it to become.

By Brian Tracy

To Do or Not To

2007-06-03T19:40:00.000+10:00

Postponement is simply stupid. Tomorrow you will also have to decide, so why not today? And do you think that tomorrow you will be wiser than today? Do you think that tomorrow you will be livelier than today? Do you think that tomorrow you will be younger than today, fresher than today? Tomorrow you will be older, your courage will be less; tomorrow you will be more experienced, your cunningness will be more; tomorrow death will come closer--you will start wavering and being more afraid. Never postpone for the tomorrow. And who knows? Tomorrow may come or may not come. If you have to decide you have to decide right now. Dr. Vogel, the dentist, finished his examination on a pretty young patient. "Miss Baseman," he said, "I'm afraid I'm going to have to pull out your wisdom teeth!" "Oh, my!" exclaimed the girl. "I'd rather have a baby!" "Well," said Dr. Vogel, "could you make up your mind so that I can adjust the chair?" Make up your mind. Don't go on postponing infinitely.

Osho Dang Dang Doko Dang Chapter 8

Commentary:

The woman in this picture is living in a gray landscape, full of unreal, cut-out clouds. Through the window frame she can see colors and light and aliveness, and although she would like to move through the frame--as we can see by the rainbow colors appearing in her garment--she can't quite manage to do it. There is still too much 'what-if?' activity in her mind. Tomorrow never comes, they say, but no matter how often it is said, it seems that most of us tend to forget the truth of it. In fact, the one and only result of postponing things is a dull and depressing feeling of incompletion and 'stuck-ness' today. The relief and expansiveness you will feel once you put aside all the dithering thoughts that are preventing you from acting now will make you wonder why you ever waited so long.

[http://www.osho.com]

Brain Power!

2007-05-30T16:58:00.000+10:00

For most part of our lives, we have been educated in ways not to win but to survive. Our minds have been programmed to think ‘in-the-box’ so much so we live life half-baked and unpassionate. Is that really the life we want? Is that really what life has been intended for us?

The answer is No.

Listen to the words as you read it: N-O.

People were born with tremendous potential and we use so little of our greatest tool – our brain.

Our school education didn’t teach us to be great. Instead it binds us to smallness, to limitations and to fear. How many of us can remember school to be an inspiration? I’m not denying that school education is an important key, however, we have to identify that it is not the only key to open doors. Education does not stop at school. It is a lifelong journey. And the only way to unlock our magnanimous potential is to learn continuously.

Knowledge is Power. And Power is Wealth. If we are to be powerful, it is in all facets of life – money, relationship, spirituality, health and most important of all, mindset. It is only when we master being humane that we become rich. Wealth is not measured by what we have but by what we are.

I have a purpose. A purpose that have been resonating in me since I was a child. That purpose is to spread Inspiration; grow Hope; show Love. I have a dream of bringing people up to greater heights in life. A life so unimaginable that they forget what fear is. A life so great that they become unstoppable. That is the life we should all be living from.

My intention in this lifetime is to reach out to people so that they become empowered and enriched. There is no maybe, no some day, no one day for me. There is only Now and Must.

"Love after Love"

2007-05-16T13:46:00.000+10:00

The time will come
when with elation,
you will greet your self arriving
at your own door,
in your own mirror,
and each will smile at the other's welcome,
and say sit here. Eat.
You will love again the stranger who was your self.
Give wine. Give bread. Give back your heart
to itself, to the stranger who has loved you
all your life, whom you ignored
for another, who knows you by heart.
Take down the love letters from the bookshelf,
the photographs, the desperate notes,
peel your own image from the mirror.
Sit. Feast on your life.

- DEREK WALCOTT

Gods in Chrysalis

2007-04-30T15:28:00.000+10:00

"Whenever you go out of the doors, draw the chin in, carry the crown of the head high and fill the lungs to the utmost; drink in the sunshine; greet your friends with a smile and put soul into every handclasp.

Do not fear being misunderstood and do not waste a minute thinking about your enemies. Try to fix firmly in your mind that you would like to do and then without veering off direction, you will move straight to the goal.

Keep your mind on the great and splendid things you would like to do and then as the days go gliding by, you will find yourself unconsciously seizing upon the opportunity that are required for the fulfillement of your desire, just as the coral insect takes from the running tide the element it needs. Pciture in your mind the able, earnest, useful person you desire to be, and the thought you hold is hourly transforming you into that particular individual.

Thought is supreme.

Preserve a right mental attitude - the attitude of courage, frankness and good cheer. To think rightly is to create. All things come through desire and every sincere prayer is answered.
We become like that on which our hearts are fixed.

Carry your chin in and the crown of your head high. We are gods in Chrysalis."

- Elbert Hubbard.

Coming into a Dream

2007-04-30T15:20:00.000+10:00

Let me tell you about a dream that I had. Someone put me back in school and there was all these things I had to do. Student things. Sports. Studies. Rules. Activities. And I dreaded every moment.

They had odd uniforms, odd sports, odd teachers and odder kids. How awful. At the end of the dream, I was running uphill and I thought, 'I could make this a pretty pathetic experience or I could make the best of the bad. And I fell into everything I did with deep enthusiasm and passion.

When I woke up, I felt that this was Now. And no different from my dream.

That even though I don't have everything I'd like to have, although everything isn't going the way I want it to, I still have a choice - to make it as dreadful as I believe it to be or the best.
Have fun while you can. Play. Don't drown in pity and don't take things or life so seriously. Life and Death is all a game that people fall in and out of. We are all players so PLAY.

'Live' is not just a word for 'breathe' or 'eat' or 'survive'. Whatever our purpose is in Life, we ought to live it with Full Intention. Play Hard. Live Hard. Love Hard (love in this context is define to be above physical lust; it is love of no condition. No boundaries).

Run with purpose, walk with purpose, drink coffee with purpose, laugh with purpose and you can never fail in Life.

Attitude Gratitude

2007-04-10T10:56:00.000+10:00

The Gratitude Journal

In her book ‘Simple Abundance’, Sarah Ban Breathnach describes how we can enrich our life by creating a daily gratitude journal.

‘Each night before I go to bed, I write down five things that I can be grateful about that day. Real life isn’t always going to be perfect or go our way, but the recurring acknowledgment of what is working in our lives can help us not only to survive but surmount our difficulties.

Simplicity, order, harmony, beauty and joy – all other principles that can transform your life will not blossom and flourish without gratitude…You simply will not be the same person two months from now after consciously giving thanks each day for the abundance that exists in your life. And you will have set in motion an ancient spiritual law: the more you have and are grateful for, the more will be given you.

As you focus on the abundance rather than on the lack in your life, you will be designing a wonderful new blueprint for the future. This sense of fulfillment is gratitude at work. This sense of fulfillment is gratitude at work, transforming your dreams into reality. Begin this day to explore and integrate this beautiful, life-affirming principle into your life, and the miracle you have been seeking will unfold to your wonder and amazement’.

I Already Have All That I Seek

2007-04-09T00:21:00.000+10:00

We're an answer-driven society. Everything we do we need answers.
We climb ladders. We climb mountains.
We go on journeys. We go for quests.
We chase. We search.
We look in the soul. We look at the soul. We look beyond the soul.

Have we found what we've been searching for?

What is it that we're looking for?

Do we even know?

How do we know the Hows, when we don't know the Whats?

We're lost, confused and disoriented.

But we're never hope-less.

If there's one thing about the humankind, we never lose hope. We may lose it as individuals, but as a collective, we care too much to do that. Have you ever given up hope on your family, friends or partners? That's what I mean. We're resilient in that sense. Hard to get rid of. Almost pest-like. Like cockroaches :D

So how do we know what we're looking for?

Look in the Whys.

This cycle of insanity is a fruitless one. As mentioned before, we seem to delight in this 'carrot & donkey' sequence of life. As though happiness is at the end of the 'string ofs...'.
The string of... graduation, work, wealth, sex, marriage, children, retirement... etc.

Myself? I'm like a dog chasing it's tail.

Came a day. One miserable day. A day I intent it to be miserable with my miserable thoughts. So miserable, I was miserable.

I was miserable because.
I was miserable because I felt I had nothing materially substantial to show for my 26 years of existence.
I was miserable because while the rest of the world had BMWs and LVs I had nothing
I was miserable because ten years ago, I had envisioned myself in love and in style.

So I was running a list of things in my mind: things I would do if; things I would feel when; things I would say at...etc.

In other words, I was saying that I can only be happy with myself if I'm thin, rich and beautiful.

Only later. Never here. Never now. Never in the moment.

Then I read. Even though I read it before. A singular line that meant everything and can mean also absolutely nothing. So powerful yet so power-less. In that moment, all things that clouded me depart.

"I have all that I seek."

Which simply means. There is nothing to achieve because I have it. There are no answers to seek. Because there are no questions. Everything that is to be provided for is already provided.

I have everything I need in this life.

Something else I read somewhere which I will loosely quote: "As long as you have shoulders, you will have clothes. As long as you have a mouth, you will have food."
And I will also like to add: "As long as you have limbs, you will have work. As long as you have ears, you have music. And as long as you have sight, you will have beauty."

In other words, be grateful for.

There is much to give thanks.

Talking Heads

2007-03-20T13:19:00.000+11:00

Yes, you probably got this this morning. You probably read it. Thought about it. Thought little about it. Thought nothing about it. But I want you to re-think. So I cannot emphasize any more how important this is for you. I don't gain anything from doing this. Maybe a few nutters comments but I think all is well-received.

Dear friends,
Today is an email day for me.
It is a day simply devoted to writing emails to my family and to my friends.
I have not done this for a long time.
In fact... the last time I did that, it was in 1999. And this is just about
writing emails. Not forwarding emails. Or replying emails. Just writing them
from my heart.

But what calls to this devotion isn't quite as bizarre. What prompted all
this is after going to the Landmark Forum. Ahhhhh.... now you understand.
But the Landmark Forum isn't responsible for this. I am.

I haven't written a hearty-from-the-heart email for so long because I've
forgotten who I am and what I enjoy doing most. I grew up and I became too
old to write emails.

We've all been through the 'I'm-too-old-for-this-now'. And in fact, we're
living it. All of a sudden, we feel to old to play. Too old to tickle. Too
old to dance in the rain. Too old to look at the clouds and imagine pink
elephants. All of a sudden, we were told, and we told ourselves, to grow up.
And that's the day we went to sleep in our waking moments.

I've been asleep for a long time. And it usually starts the minute I get up
from bed.
When I wake up I want to go back to sleep.
When I'm brushing my teeth, I'm thinking of breakfast.
When I'm having breakfast, I'm thinking about work.
When I'm at work, I'm thinking about home.
When I'm at home, I'm thinking about what to cook.
When I'm cooking, I think about what's on TV.
When I'm watching TV, I think how nice it is to be them.
And then I brush my teeth, change in to my jammies, go to sleep and think
I've done a fat lot for myself.

We think we're in charge of our lives but we're not. We think we make our
decisions but we don't. We think we're free but we're prisoners.

So what are we?

What are we doing?

What do we want in life?

The answer: We are really victims of our thoughts. Thoughts? What thoughts?
That one. The one that's asking, 'What thoughts?'
The 'voices in our head' tells us what we can do and what we cannot. How
many of us here have had conflicting thoughts. For example, when my nephew
tells me he loves me, a voice in my head says, 'no you don't'. Simply
because I 'think' he's too young to know what love is. Pfft.... Or when my
boss said to me, 'We missed you' (while I was on holiday) ... the voice in
my head said, "Yea right. Liar."

People, that voice is not real. It is not us. And it is not who we are.

The same voice also tells us when to be happy. It will tell us that we are
only happy when we're in school. And when we're in school, we're not happy.
Then it tells us, look at your parents, look how happy they are as adults.
So we say, 'When I grow up, I'll be happy'. Then we grow up, and we're still
not happy. Then we say, 'I know... I'll get a high-paying job, get money,
buy some really cool stuff THEN I'll be happy." Still not happy. 'Get a
girlfriend/ boyfriend THEN I'll be happy'. Stillll not happy. 'Get married
then I'll be happy'. Nope. 'How about some kids? I'll be happy then'. Uh-uh.
'When I retire, get the kids out the house, go on holiday... I'll definitely
be happy.'

You know what? You get a phone call from your doctor. He says he found a
lump in your breast/ balls. And you only have 3 months to live.

And you live the rest of that 3 months thinking, I wish I was happy when I
had the chance to be happy i.e. in school, at work, being single, being
un-single, without kids and with kids.

Life is indeed bull shit.

But it is only bull shit if we think it's bull shit and all we always will
have will be bull shit.

People, we will never be happy later. We will never be happy when we're
thin, rich and beautiful.

We all have a choice to happy now. To take responsibility of our thoughts,
our emotions and our actions. If we don't believe we can be happy or loved,
we will never feel happy or loved and we will never allow happiness or love
to come into our lives.

That's why I want you to do the Landmark Forum. Wherever you are.

I'm not an ambassador of the forum. I'm not working for them. And no, I
don't get money for writing this email. Not even a voucher.

I'm writing this email because I know you can be greater than you think you
are.

And the only reason why you think you're not good enough is because you
think so.
But I don't.

I'm not asking you to get fixed or changed. You're not a car. That's nothing
about you that needs to be fixed. Because, there's nothing wrong with you in
the first place.
The word here is not about fixing or changing. It's about transformation.
Being aware of a greater possibility.

But I know you can create a difference in your life. A happy difference. I
know you can do so much more. You are more than what you imagine.

And I know the only way to reach our highest potential is to understand our
selves. We don't know ourselves enough. It's the voice in the head that
makes us think we do. We DON'T. If you can see how much more you can BE in
life. If you can only see how much more you can DO in life. If you can only
see how much more you can GIVE to life and also RECEIVE in life, you won't
be stuck with the voice in your head.

Do the Landmark Forum. Don't see it as a thing. See it as a key to unlock
possibilities to your highest potential. We all need education to learn, to
have a skill. Take it as a skill you want to have in order to know and love
who you truly are.

With love,
Mable

YawNn sTrecTch mOAn

2007-03-05T10:22:00.000+11:00

It's a little dusty rusty in here isn't it?

Nobody's probably here much.

But you know... it's funny... when something is made so available to you the less it seems appealing.

Like for example, if you had tubs of chocolate fudge ice cream lying all around you waiting to be picked up, it'll remain... waiting to be picked up. Why? Simply because it doesn't become a novelty anymore. To me, it might look like a miniature potted scrub.

My point is: I had the Internet, the PC, the lettuce, the tomatoes, the lots for a whole month and I simply didn't bother to blog. Why? It just didn't seem appealing. My 'why' wasn't strong enough. I had other things better to do (even though I probably didn't). I was busy (even though I might not)... the thing is... this - like every other gross human habit that I own - is unhealthy. Discipline is such a undeveloped skill, I feel like a crab with one claw too tiny.

I'll make an effort from now on.

Maybe.

If and when the time is right.

Hrm... or maybe just when I feel like it.

Change,Choice,Decision by Jim Rohn

2007-01-16T23:50:00.000+11:00

"One of the best places to start to turn your life around is by doing whatever appears on your mental "I should" list.

Indecision is the thief of opportunity.

Every life form seems to strive to its maximum except human beings. How tall will a tree grow? As tall as it possibly can. Human beings, on the other hand, have been given the dignity of choice. You can choose to be all or you can choose to be less. Why not stretch up to the full measure of the challenge and see what all you can do?

You cannot change your destination overnight, but you can change your direction overnight.

Decision making can sometimes seem like inner civil war.

I used to say, "I sure hope things will change." Then I learned that the only way things are going to change for me is when I change.

Don't say, "If I could, I would." Say, "If I can, I will."

It doesn't matter which side of the fence you get off on sometimes. What matters most is getting off! You cannot make progress without making decisions.

We generally change ourselves for one of two reasons: inspiration or desperation.

If you don't like how things are, change it! You're not a tree."

Summer Holiday

2007-01-06T22:35:00.000+11:00

The Chinese Mystic's Last Surprise by Osho

2006-12-30T19:14:00.000+11:00

Laughter is eternal, life is eternal, celebration continues. Actors change but the drama continues. Waves change but the ocean continues. You laugh, you change--and somebody else laughs--but laughter continues. You celebrate, somebody else celebrates, but celebration continues.

Existence is continuous, it is a continuum. There is not a single moment's gap in it. No death is death, because every death opens a new door--it is a beginning. There is no end to life, there is always a new beginning, a resurrection.

If you change your sadness to celebration, then you will also be capable of changing your death into resurrection. So learn the art while there is still time.

I have heard about three Chinese mystics. Nobody knows their names now, and nobody ever knew their names. They were known only as the "Three Laughing Saints" because they never did anything else; they simply laughed.

These three people were really beautiful--laughing, and their bellies shaking. And then it would become an infection and others would start laughing. The whole marketplace would laugh. When just a few moments before, it was an ugly place where people were thinking only of money, suddenly these three mad people came and changed the quality of the whole marketplace. Now they had forgotten that they had come to purchase and sell. Nobody bothered about greed. For a few seconds a new world opened.

They moved all over China, from place to place, from village to village, just helping people to laugh. Sad people, angry people, greedy people, jealous people--they all started laughing with them. And many felt the key--you can be transformed.

Then, in one village it happened that one of the three died. Village people gathered and they said, "Now there will be trouble. Now we have to see how they laugh. Their friend has died; they must weep."

But when they came, the two were dancing, laughing and celebrating the death. The village people said, "Now this is too much. When a man is dead it is profane to laugh and dance."

They said, "The whole life we laughed with him. How can we give him the last send-off with anything else?--we have to laugh, we have to enjoy, we have to celebrate. This is the only farewell that is possible for a man who has laughed his whole life. We don't see that he is dead. How can laughter die, how can life die?"

Then the body was to be burned, and the village people said, "We will give him a bath as the ritual prescribes." But those two friends said, "No, our friend has said, 'Don't perform any ritual and don't change my clothes and don't give me a bath. You just put me as I am on the burning pyre.' So we have to follow his instructions."

And then, suddenly, there was a great happening. When the body was put on the fire, that old man had played the last trick. He had hidden many fireworks under his clothes, and suddenly there was a festival! Then the whole village started laughing. These two mad friends were dancing, then the whole village started dancing.

It was not a death, it was a new life.

Living Totally by Osho

2006-12-30T15:47:00.000+11:00

"When Alexander the Great was coming to India, he met one strange man, Diogenes. It was a winter morning, a cool breeze was blowing, and Diogenes was lying on the riverbank, taking a sunbath, naked. He was a beautiful man--when there is a beautiful soul, a beauty arises which is not of this world.

He had nothing, not even a begging-bowl, because one day when he was going toward the river with his begging bowl to get some water to drink, he saw a dog rushing to the river. The dog jumped in the river and drank--Diogenes laughed and he said, "This dog has taught me a lesson. If he can live without a begging bowl, then why can't I?" He threw the begging-bowl, he also jumped like the dog in the river and drank. Since then he had had nothing.

Alexander had never seen such a graceful man, such utter beauty, something from the unknown.... He was in awe and he said, "Sir..." He had never said "Sir" to anybody in his life. He said, "Sir, I am immensely impressed by your being, and I would like to do something for you. Is there something that I can do for you?

Diogenes said, "Just stand to the side because you are blocking the sun--that's all. Nothing else do I need."

Alexander said, "If I have another chance to come to the earth I will ask God, instead of making me Alexander again, to make me Diogenes."

Diogenes laughed and he said, "Who is preventing you right now? You can become a Diogenes. Where are you going? For months I have seen armies moving and moving--where are you going? and for what?"

Alexander said, I am going to India to conquer the whole world."

"And then what are you going to do?" Diogenes asked.

And Alexander said, "Then I will rest."

Diogenes laughed again and he said, "You are mad--because I am resting now, and I have not conquered the world. I don't see the necessity of it. Who has told you that before resting, you have to conquer the world? And I tell you: if you don't rest now, then you never will. Something or other will always remain to be conquered... and time is fleeting. You will die in the middle of your journey--everybody dies in the middle of the journey."

And Alexander died in the middle. When he was moving back from India, he died on the way. And that day he remembered Diogenes. Only Diogenes was in his mind--he could never rest in his life, and that man rested."

The Woman on the Bus by Osho

2006-12-28T19:50:00.000+11:00

I have heard that an old woman was traveling on a bus, and she was anxious, worried, and continuously asking what stop it was. The stranger sitting by her side said, "Relax, don't be worried. The conductor will go on announcing what stop it is, and if you are too worried I will call him here. You can tell him where you want to get off so he can keep a note of it. And you can relax!"

He called the conductor and the woman said, "Please remember, I don't want to miss my stop. I have to reach somewhere very urgently."

The conductor said, "Okay, I will make a note of it--although even without your asking I will be announcing each stop. But I will make a note of it and I will come to you particularly and tell you whenever your stop comes. But you relax, don't be so worried about it!"

She was perspiring and trembling and looked so tense. So she said, "Okay, you note it down--I have to get off at the bus terminus."

Now if it is the bus terminus, why should you worry? How can you miss it? There is no way of missing it! The moment you rest, the moment you relax, you know that existence is already going, moving, reaching towards higher peaks. And you are part of it. You need not have separate ambitions.

This is relaxation--resting, dropping all private goals, dropping the whole achieving mind, all the ego projections. And then life is a mystery. Your eyes will be full of wonder; your heart will be full of awe.

We are not to become something--we are already it. This is the whole message of all the awakened ones: that you are not to achieve something, it has already been given to you. It is God's gift. You are already where you should be, you can't be anywhere else. There is nowhere to go, nothing to achieve. Because there is nowhere to go and nothing to achieve, you can celebrate. Then there is no hurry, no worry, no anxiety, no anguish, no fear of being a failure. You can't fail. In the very nature of things it is impossible to fail, because there is no question of success at all.

A Little Dino

2006-12-28T18:31:00.000+11:00

A little dinosaur bared her teeth at me.

She did not say, "Grr!"

Nor did she say, "Gah!"

but she smiled with her ice cream covered lips, and said sunnily, "Hullo!"

And I smiled back a shiny smile and said, "Hi!"

I asked. "How are you?"

The little dino said, fine thank you. And her other dino friends giggled.

"Why are you in a dinosaur suit?"

The little dino replied "No reason."

And I grinned, "You are amazing."

I wished I'd asked them to sing me a birthday song. It would have been so cool to have an army of little dino girls piping up a happy song on my birth day. But I was in a hurry to help the Heartbroken Fish escape.

It is/was/always will be a very happy happy day.

déjà vu

2006-12-24T11:25:00.000+11:00

"the experience of feeling that one has witnessed or experienced a new situation previously." [en.wikipedia.org]

Have you had one of those?

You walk along a street and you're suddenly enveloped with the feeling of déjà vu. You've been there. You've done that. You've seen her. But the strange fact is, you've never.

How is it you've met that girl with the beautiful hazel eyes when you've never seen her in all your life? Or walked past that tree, post box, yellow bee-striped car, when you haven't?

What if déjà vus are second chances? What if some of us had the opportunity to re-live our lives again for a second time? You know how you say things like: "I wish I could turn back time." or "If I had the chance to do it all over again..." So what if we got what we wanted but forgot we made that wish? Would we really do things any differently?

Maybe some of us have died and God in all his wisdom decided we deserved another go. Would we be happier? Would we live life fuller? Would we cry less, love more, talk less, listen more, eat less, have more fun? What are we doing with our second chances now that we have our second chances? Would we still say, 'What if'?

Would we still say, 'Could have...', 'Should have...', 'Would have...'? Because if déjà vus were second chances, it seems to me, we need triple, quadruple takes in order to get things right-er, better, more accurately significantly happier.
Which means humankind are pretty much blardy slow learners.

Aloneless

2006-12-24T11:02:00.000+11:00

Somedays can be a little confusing. A mix muddle of information that channels into your life and become clutter. So on days like that all you want to do is to be alone. You can call it running away. Some may call it hiding. But whatever the words, being alone can be healing. It heals the soul, coats it with comfort, blankets your mind and soothes it to rest. There are times in life we must rest. Rest from tiresome thoughts, tiresome people, tiresome activities and just be ... quiet.

We are our very own best company. I've told my friends many times that we've come in this world alone and we'll leave this world alone. There are books written, articles published, talk show hosted on the importance of alone-ness. You know it and I know it. But many don't follow it. Quiet moments should be used on reflecting and looking deep into our hearts and listen what we don't usually listen. Who better but us to listen to our hearts?

And people become often lost, listless and disconnected because they've forgotten to reconnect to their very hearts. The one thing they should listen to but don't because there are always someone out there that have a better idea what they should be doing with their lives. But really, who better than you to know? Who better to tell you to dance, when your heart feels like dancing? Who better to tell you to sing, when your heart feels the music? Who better to tell you to love, when your heart is soaring to love?

Your Self.

Give yourself the gift of your company this Christmas. Look into the window of soul and see. Look carefully and say with all honesty, are you happy? Ask you that simple three-worded question: Am I happy? And if you can respond with a sharp resounding confident Yes, then you truly are. But if you hesitate within just a breath of a second, you are... faking it.

Don't fake it darlings. Don't fall for your own lies. If you aren't happy, don't be afraid to say you're not. Because the moment you know you aren't, all that there is now, is to go up; grow up. You deserve better.

Look into your hearts this new year and every new year to be alone. To heal. To comfort. To love your self. To re-connect with your soul. Listen to what your heart tells you and follow it. Trust yourself because who better but yourself?

If anyone told you...

2006-12-21T22:47:00.000+11:00

You couldn't do it. Ask them why.

If that anyone was to be you. Ask yourself why. Because there is no reason to why you cannot succeed in something you believe so strongly, so passionately, so vividly about.

What you imagine yourself to be. You can be.

What you think yourself to be. You will be.

What you see yourself to be. You shall be.

You must not, should not, will not give the meaning to the phrase 'I can't'. If you do, you are merely acting as your own executioner.

"You were born to win, but to be a winner you must plan to win, prepare to win, and expect to win." – Zig Ziglar

Melbourne Underground

2006-12-12T22:04:00.000+11:00

Brain Feed by Jim Rohn

2006-12-12T13:18:00.000+11:00

"The major reason for setting a goal is for what it makes of you to accomplish it. What it makes of you will always be the far greater value than what you get.

When Andrew Carnegie died, they discovered a sheet of paper upon which he had written one of the major goals of his life: to spend the first half of his life accumulating money and to spend the last half of his life giving it all away. And he did!

Some people are disturbed by those tough days because all they have is the days. They haven't designed or described or defined the future.

Goals. There's no telling what you can do when you get inspired by them. There's no telling what you can do when you believe in them. And there's no telling what will happen when you act upon them.

We all need lots of powerful long-range goals to help us past the short-term obstacles.

The ultimate reason for setting goals is to entice you to become the person it takes to achieve them.

Don't set your goals too low. If you don't need much, you won't become much.

If you go to work on your goals, your goals will go to work on you. If you go to work on your plan, your plan will go to work on you. Whatever good things we build end up building us.

We all have two choices: We can make a living or we can design a life."

Footprints Cast in Stone

2006-12-12T11:09:00.000+11:00

Every one we meet leaves some sort of impact in our lives. It can be the size of Yamagata or a sting of a bee. But either way, they always always leave an impression. I've met some people, known them for years but can't remember anything rich from that experience. I've also had the pleasure of meeting people for a few minutes and I feel like I've been hit by lighting. Some people are a waste of time and energy, some people you just can't get enough of. But however minute their own significance are, I strongly feel that we are all interconnected and placed together at one place and one time for some reason because Nothing is a Coincidence.

Some time ago or most recently, one person left a happy mark in my life. And though it was brief, it was never short of interesting. And though he was imperfectly perfect, he was gone like the spring wind. The good things in life are fleeting because it is in their transcient existence that makes it somewhat enjoyable. It's like a fast fading beauty of a flower. We treasure what little time it has with us.

Obsession

2006-11-06T18:17:00.000+11:00

Scarcity creates obsession.

When you have something so little of e.g. good quality friends, plenty of money, love etc. you become quite obsessed with the idea of owning it.

For example, there is story of a man who have no known best friend. He recognises this. And so he realises that the only person he can rely on is his dear wife. So his love turns into a mess of obsession. He becomes so deeply obsessed with her he begins to chain her to his insecurity. Binds her to him. Slowly but surely suffocating her.

We can relate to that obsession. All of us have something precious, a crown jewel; a deeply cherished item we do not want lost. We are all at the brink of obsession because we are all controlled by two emotions: fear and greed. When we fear that we may lose something, we hang on to it. A car. A piece of stone. A person. We hold on because we feel safe having it. We hang on to it as though it is our dear life. But all fear is, it is only mental.

Coming back to my story. The-man-with-his-deep-love-for-his-wife-because-he-has-no-one-else-in-the-world guards his wife so jealously, that she becomes to fade like a flower without sunshine. As much as she loves him, she cannot be with him. It is like a swim between yin and yang. She fights, at first, for her freedom. For her identity. But her loyalty to this man she has sworn to be with for better or for worst, eats into her heart and produces - guilt. So she ebbs away. And one day surely when she dies, he will die too. She from a broken heart and he from a broken mind.

Everyone has an obsession stemmed from scarcity.

Greed: "I want a red convertible so I can look cool every day"

Brainfark

2006-11-06T17:55:00.000+11:00

Stimulating discussions about life has always left me engrossed. Sometimes exhausted. Mostly boggled. But nevertheless, extremely exhilirated. Socrates sat in a busy market contemplating, debating, asking the people of Roma question that left their minds buzzing and more often than not, their tongues too. Zen masters toy with their apprentices' minds: Throwing riddles and rewarding them with enlightenment, so full of promise but so laced with hope, the mind just burst into fumes, smoking in delusion, basically leaving those smart-thinking-monkeys-thinking-smart - brainfarked.

I enjoy a good healthy thought-provoking conversation with an individual any time. Pity they come so rare. I can count with my chubby ugly toes how few there are that I know of but howeversofew, that also means that they're precious.

You can never contain one of those individuals in one place. Their eyes gives out a restless glint that you so seldom find - that fire that burns a passion to live a life that is so full, that it inspires you. No matter how much I explain it here, there or every where, no one can or will understand. But maybe you do.

Look into the eyes of a child. Your child. And you will see it.

Alice in the Looking Glass

Superwomen

2006-10-27T02:25:00.000+10:00

Acceptance is a heroic attempt. It is one of the hardest things to do next to Patience and Faith.

This is also why I'm not a superhero because I have very little of any.

I had a thought the other day... a guilty thought. The sort that makes you think 'Shit...'

So shit....

I'm guilt-ridden for not accepting my mates for who they are, when they have supported me at every turn of my life for being me. The eccentric, extremely difficult, loud and vocal me. Yeap, they'd be the one right now to say, 'Aww, you're alright... don't be too harsh on yourself and (possibly) we love you for who you are.' And that makes me sink even lower in shits.

This all, of course, started from me. Me -- for going through all these series of mind-altering, character-analysing seminars. Me -- for pushing the brand of new psycho transforming ideas down my pals' throats. Me -- for believing that my AHAs should be everyone's AHAs.

Not everyone gets the same epiphanies.

I'm not smarter than everyone else. I'm not any ounce more superior. I'm not any chance better.

Acceptance is not about scraping people out of their comfort zones. It is accepting them for who they are and supporting their ambition or maybe even the lack of it as their own unique personality. If the whole world was made out of leaders, we'd all end up killing one another. If the whole world was made out of shakers, well... I guess the whole world would bounce out of its sphere. We need the yin for the yang, the yang for the yin.

UN-acceptance is the reason why many marriages end up in divorces. Of course that opinion itself may be very off track since I've never been married or in a 'stable relationship' before but women who want to change their Ray Romanos (Everybody Loves Raymond) into stepford husbands could be in love for the wrong reason. Personally, 6 out of 10 people I know use more words to gripe about their boyfriends/ husbands than love. I'm actually quite happy to know that I indeed do know 40% sane happy women.

The top 5 things they complain about their imperfect men are:
1. 'He's not romantic enough.'
2. 'He doesn't care about his appearance enough.'
3. 'He doesn't spend time with me enough.'
4. 'He doesn't spend on me enough.'
5. 'He doesn't listen enough.'

Take note that there's repetition of the word 'enough'. (Whatever is 'enough' anyway?)

People who don't know acceptance, don't understand (enough). Let's use me for an example. I don't think I've taken the time to understand what my friends are really like. It doesn't mean I don't care, but it's just that I've didn't care enough. I've been a blardy selfish arse.

So this is to me mates. Thanks for withstanding my crap. You've done well, superheroes....

Snacks & Snippets (Random Thoughts)

2006-10-20T14:56:00.000+10:00

Hrmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.....

Seeing I have an hour to kill, I should blog for the sake of blogging.
Work is at an odd hour today - 5p.m. till 9.30p.m. on a Friday night. It's late night shopping and everyone has got their pay cashed in. Ka Ching. By end of tomorrow, the weeks' pay is gone. Why? Because tomorrow, the horses are out of their dens and on to the tracks. It's Caulfied Cup time!

See the pretty ladies in stilletoes; their fancy bird-feathered hats; the champagne glasses bubbling with Moet & Chandon; their pretty painted smiles and starry white teeth.

See the men in their polished shoes, smoothed out hair, gleaming manicured fingernails; their practiced jokes; their alcohol breath; the black and blue smoke coming out from their credit cards.

Ah... spring.

And how do we measure an act of decent kindness?

Is it a smile to a stranger? A hug to a mourner? The chair to an elder? Or is it the value of generosity you put in the bowl of a beggar?

I was standing in KFC last night. We were ordering dinner. A scruffy looking guy asked us for a dollar. My companion asked, 'Why do you need a dollar? Is it for drugs?'. The toothless twenty-something man said no. But instead of giving him money, my friend bought him a meal. The act I witness, is something I read in books, made in movies, imagined in dreams. If he was trying to impress me, I was. But seeing that it wasn't a date, I view it as an act of genuine thoughtfulness and generosity.

The scruffy toothless young man wolved down his Zinger meal. Walked out of the door without saying a word of thanks. Came back in again and started where he left: asking patrons for a dollar to spare.

My parents have always taught the kids to be nice to the people you meet. It pays to be nice. You never know when fate will bite you in the rear end.

I was waiting for the doors to open. 9 a.m. shifts aren't my personal favourites. Another girl was there. She looked familiar to me. Where have I seen her before? School? She's definitely Malaysian. We exchanged niceties. I told her what I thought, found out she's three years younger than I am (rules out school, I rarely remember anyone apart from my year). Work? Hrm. Nope, never worked with magazines.

Waitaminute, did I say magazine? But of course! She was one of the finalist for the first seventeen Magazine Star Search! She did her cheer leading act on stage. Helps her mom with her batik designing business. Sister to four other siblings.

A few thousand miles away from the streets of KL. Three years later. I meet my past in front of Sportsgirl in Melbourne, Australia at (now) 9.10 a.m. on a rather warm spring morning.

Neigh

2006-10-02T20:38:00.000+10:00

I've just been had by my friend. And to make matters even worse, she used my own technique against me. I mean, it's like having a parent being told off by their kids and you can't rebutt because it's right y'know?

Sugar.

It went like this:

Her parents made her go to a lantern festival. She didn't want to go. She kicked up a fuss. Her parents fussed at her kicks.

I'm stricken with envy here because I've been pining to go for a lantern party. My other friends have been sending me invites from home and I tell ya, it's sure isn't nice to feel so welcomed. What's the point of it when you can't be there?

But that's besides the point, I love mid-autumn festivals. It's that one time in the year you're allowed to play with fire. You get to see beautiful floating luminescent bubbles on one end and a big kid at the other.

The year before, when the monkees were away, I'd accumulate a mass of lanterns and lit them up in the garden singlehandedly anyway. Last year, I had to slave over a story due the next day, my friends called at my gate with lanterns. This time the monkees were only too delighted and since I'd burnt the lanterns the previous year (Note: private bonfire), we used an indecent battery-operated Ultraman lantern and walked into the dark night with a bunch of rowdy teenagers. One other year, we had the Argentinian neighbours put up lanterns in their mango trees while we sipped Chinese tea, munched on mooncakes, and swapped local legends till late. At college, my mates and I decided to throw it at an Indian classmate's house and while we ordered pizza, we vandalized her driveway with rows of candles.

There are many other sentimental moments I can think of about mid-autumn festival. I can still smell the freshly baked mooncakes and the evening sun streaming through the windows. I can see my mom making a fresh batch with the delicately carved wooden mold. I can taste the spices, nuts, egg yolks, sweet pastries in my mind. It rules over Chinese New Year, Chap Go Meh, Hanukkah and even Christmas.

So you see, it has a very very very special place in my heart.

But I digress.

So since I'd openly expressed my dissatisfaction to my friends on msn chat, they suggested why don't I just throw one?

And before I knew it, I came up with those sugary stuff that you'd know is bad for you but it still comes out of your mouth anyway... I gave all sorts of excuses: no time, no money, no friends, no this, no that... And you know what? You nag your friends enough, they'd throw the same s*** back. So I had an earful from my friends. No time? Make time. No money? Make money. No friends. Make friends. Call it karma right? Man... it sucked.

So folks, I thank you for your straight-face kick-ass honesty. You know when to call a bucket a bucket. You know when to call a hose a hose. You know when to call a spade a spade.

I'm coming down my high horse.

High horses don't agree with me anyway.

[NOTE: Planning & discussion for Mid-Autumn party is currently in progress]

Something Out of Nothing II

2006-09-29T21:19:00.000+10:00

When it comes to meeting and conquering the negativity in your life, here is a key question: what can you do, starting today, that will make a difference? What can you do during economic chaos? What can you do when everything has gone wrong? What can you do when you've run out of money, when you don't feel well and it's all gone sour? What can you do?

Let me give you the broad answer first. You can do the most remarkable things, no matter what happens. People can do incredible things, unbelievable things, despite the most impossible or disastrous circumstances.

Here is why humans can do remarkable things: because they are remarkable. Humans are different than any other creation. When a dog starts with weeds, he winds up with weeds. And the reason is because he's a dog. But that's not true with human beings. Humans can turn weeds into gardens.

Humans can turn nothing into something, pennies into fortune, and disaster into success. And the reason they can do such remarkable things is because they are remarkable. Try reaching down inside of yourself; you'll come up with some more of those remarkable human gifts. They're there, waiting to be discovered and employed.

With those gifts, you can change anything for yourself that you wish to change. And I challenge you to do that because you can change. If you don't like how something is going for you, change it. If something isn't enough, change it. If something doesn't suit you; change it. If something doesn't please you, change it. You don't ever have to be the same after today. If you don't like your present address change it — you're not a tree!

If there is one thing to get excited about, it's your ability to make yourself do the necessary things, to get a desired result, to turn the negative into success. That's true excitement.

To Your Success,
Jim Rohn

Soldier On

2006-09-29T21:07:00.000+10:00

I think everybody should study ants. They have an amazing four-part philosophy, and here is the first part: ants never quit. That's a good philosophy. If they're headed somewhere and you try to stop them; they'll look for another way. They'll climb over, they'll climb under, they'll climb around. They keep looking for another way. What a neat philosophy, to never quit looking for a way to get where you're supposed to go.

Second, ants think winter all summer. That's an important perspective. You can't be so naive as to think summer will last forever. So ants are gathering in their winter food in the middle of summer.

An ancient story says, "Don't build your house on the sand in the summer." Why do we need that advice? Because it is important to think ahead. In the summer, you've got to think storm. You've got to think rocks as you enjoy the sand and sun.

The third part of the ant philosophy is that ants think summer all winter. That is so important. During the winter, ants remind themselves, "This won't last long; we'll soon be out of here." And the first warm day, the ants are out. If it turns cold again, they'll dive back down, but then they come out the first warm day. They can't wait to get out.

And here's the last part of the ant philosophy. How much will an ant gather during the summer to prepare for the winter? All that he possibly can. What an incredible philosophy, the "all-that-you-possibly-can" philosophy.

Wow, what a great philosophy to have - the ant philosophy. Never give up, look ahead, stay positive and do all you can.

[By: Jim Rohn]

Pride & Joy

2006-09-29T17:56:00.000+10:00

Why Some People Have All The Luck

2006-09-27T13:33:00.000+10:00

[Warning: May cause dizziness, nausea and possible mental irritation due to disbelief]

By Professor Richard Wiseman, University of Hertfordshire-

Why do some people get all the luck while others never get the breaks they deserve?

A psychologist says he has discovered the answer.

Ten years ago, I set out to examine luck. I wanted to know why some people are always in the right place at the right time, while others consistently experience ill fortune. I placed advertisements in national newspapers asking for people who felt consistently lucky or unlucky to contact me.

Hundreds of extraordinary men and women volunteered for my research and over the years, I have interviewed them, monitored their lives and had them take part in experiments.

The results reveal that although these people have almost no insight into the causes of their luck, their thoughts and behavior are responsible for much of their good and bad fortune. Take the case of seemingly chance opportunities. Lucky people consistently encounter such opportunities, whereas unlucky people do not.

I carried out a simple experiment to discover whether this was due to differences in their ability to spot such opportunities. I gave both lucky and unlucky people a newspaper, and asked them to look through it and tell me how many photographs were inside. I had secretly placed a large message halfway through the newspaper saying: "Tell the experimenter you have seen this and win $50."

This message took up half of the page and was written in type that was more than two inches high. It was staring everyone straight in the face, but the unlucky people tended to miss it and the lucky people tended to spot it.

Unlucky people are generally more tense than lucky people, and this anxiety disrupts their ability to notice the unexpected.

As a result, they miss opportunities because they are too focused on looking for something else. They go to parties intent on finding their perfect partner and so miss opportunities to make good friends. They look through newspapers determined to find certain types of job advertisements and miss other types of jobs.

Lucky people are more relaxed and open, and therefore see what is there rather than just what they are looking for. My research eventually revealed that lucky people generate good fortune via four principles. They are skilled at creating and noticing chance opportunities, make lucky decisions by listening to their intuition, create self-fulfilling prophesies via positive expectations, and adopt a resilient attitude that transforms bad luck into good.

Towards the end of the work, I wondered whether these principles could be used to create good luck. I asked a group of volunteers to spend a month carrying out exercises designed to help them think and behave like a lucky person.

Dramatic results! These exercises helped them spot chance opportunities, listen to their intuition, expect to be lucky, and be more resilient to bad luck.

One month later, the volunteers returned and described what had happened. The results were dramatic: 80% of people were now happier, more satisfied with their lives and, perhaps most important of all, luckier.

The lucky people had become even luckier and the unlucky had become lucky.

Finally, I had found the elusive "luck factor".

Here are Professor Wiseman's four top tips for becoming lucky:

1) Listen to your gut instincts - they are normally right

2) Be open to new experiences and breaking your normal routine

3) Spend a few moments each day remembering things that went well

4) Visualize yourself being lucky before an important meeting or telephone call.

"The happiest people in the world are not those who have no problems, but those who learn to live with things that are less than perfect."

Trippy Tulips

2006-09-25T17:57:00.000+10:00

I had a trippy Saturday. It's spring so the flowers are popping out like zits on a greasy teenager's face. Seeing rows of colours in a go was blinding. But like all trippy journeys, this well-trodden path was a pretty happy one. The flowers were ok. After half an hour, you don't know what you're looking at anymore. It was the Dutch folks that made it spectacular. I have something about people. I have a natural fondness for them. I actually like them. Which may not always be such a safe thing to do but in general, I view people as great objects of observation and interest. This was a good weekend. How did it go for yourself?

Cloggers

2006-09-25T17:55:00.000+10:00

Spring Shower

2006-09-25T17:48:00.000+10:00

Something Out of Nothing

2006-09-21T15:08:00.000+10:00

There are four ways to get strawberry ice cream.
What four?

You can say, "Hmm... I'd like some strawberry ice cream." And you go out and get it.

That's what we normal people do.

Or you can say, "I'll want some strawberry ice cream." And you get your boyfriend or girlfriend; husband or wife; son or daughter to get it.

That's what slave drivers do.

Another way to get strawberry ice cream is to think, "Hmm... how about that strawberry ice cream." And someone walks pass and say, 'Er... excuse me but is this your strawberry ice cream?" and you say, "Wow, thanks!"

That's what dreamers do.

And finally, the best way to get strawberry ice cream is when you just think to yourself, "I love some strawberry ice cream now." And it manifests in front of your own eyes.

That's what magicians do.

We are all magicians, believe it or not. But we forget that. We stop believing. We stop dreaming. We stop knowing. We stop understanding how the universe gives those who asks - where do you think it says, 'Seek and you shall Find'; 'Ask and you shall Receive'?
Holy books, wise men, secret letters.

Would you believe it if we were all once formless beings given form? We are in fact, million zillion of energy atoms.

I am crazy. Hell yes. Crazy enough to believe in things that have no scientific proof. But who proved God? Who proved Hell? Who proved electricity?

The world works beyond our imagination. And the only reason why it happens is because we've let ourselves forget.

Haste in Waste

2006-09-15T10:22:00.000+10:00

On the road of life, there's always a perfect time for you to pull over to the side of the road, turn off your engine and get out and walk for a while. It's time to feel like you're a bigger part of the journey. If you go too fast, you'll whisk right by beautiful, enriching people and places. Going slow you'll feel more content with where you're going.

Monkee See Monkee Do

2006-09-13T22:42:00.000+10:00

See the Monkee?

What Would Have Been

2006-09-11T14:09:00.000+10:00

A girl said to her friends, 'what would life have been if I hadn't spent the best six years of my life in a relationship?'
A wife thinks, 'what would life have been like if I hadn't had kids?'
A young man wonders, 'what would life have been like I hadn't made that promise?'

"... would I be happier?"
"... would I be full of life?"
"... would I have been greater?"

Regrets. Fears. Guilt. Shame.

We blame others but the fingers point back. For the choices we make. For the choices we fail to make. For the choices we never dreamnt of.

Are we awake when we're asleep? Or are we asleep when we're awake?

Because it's never really people, objects, places that limit us to our pallid lackluster lives.

Identity Crisis

2006-08-27T22:58:00.000+10:00

When: This morning at 8.30a.m.
What: Waiting at Caulfield train station for pickup.
Feeling Rather: Groggy. Cold. Blur.

Car pulls over. Guy waves. I look at driver, thinks: "Hrm... looks like my ride. Different car though."

Guy waves again. Now look closely, thinks: "Yea, could be the guy."

Opens car door, "Hi, good morning."

'Friend' replies, "Morning. How are you?" and clears space for me to get in.

"I'm good." Has a closer look at him. "You look different. Did you do something different to your hair (or maybe face)?"

Guy looks back. "Yeaa... changed my glasses. Say is Mike coming?"

Pause. "Who's Mike?"

Two teen girls approaches. Look at me. The car. At each other.

"Er..."

Long pause. "Wait... are you Johnny?"

"Er... no."

(Thinks real fast: shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit...)
"Oops. Sorry. Wrong guy. Ha. Ha. Ha."
(... shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit)

Quickly exits.

Real friend turns up.

I swear. They had the same voice. Same accent. Same sort of face. Any guy looks identical with baseball cap and glasses.

Eureka

2006-08-25T23:02:00.000+10:00

This evening I made baked pear, strawberries with melted chocolate over filo pastry. Spread the filo on a baking tray. Spread and sprinkle with milky love. Chop juicy pears up, bits of strawberries and finally, lavish it with Cadbury dairy chocos. Fold up the pastry corners. Pop it in the oven for about 20 to 25 minutes or until pastry puffs up like a goldfish. Embrace with fork. Absolute heaven on a chilly winter night.

Would be even more fantastic if you softly sift a snow of icing sugar on.

Magic.

A Bite More of Perth...

2006-08-25T17:04:00.000+10:00

... From my phone camera

Reads beneath the clock face: "Do minute gone comes ever back again? Take heed and see ye nothing do in vain."
I *heart* Corica's footlong apple strudel
God gave me Rainbow Colours

Running Through

2006-08-24T12:35:00.000+10:00

This is why I love keeping old emails. They're like old letters you find in an old shoe box hidden in a musty old room for many old years until you stumble on them again looking for the faded memories of your good ol' days. Ah... Nolstagia sounds like the name of a beautiful Russian doll.

> Here's something I found from an old book. Can't remember the title.
> Book of Etiquette I think. Published in 1941. I'm not one for all the
> self-help rubbish, but this kinda spoke to me.
>
> "There are certain plants so sensitive that their leaves close the moment
> they are touched. There are people like these plants who are so highly
> sensitive that at the least slight, fancied or real, they close up
> tightly within themselves.
>
> Sensitiveness is a form of pride, and pride offends and irritates
> people. It is an exaggerated form of self-consciousness. It is the
> result of too much thinking about self.
>
> If you are sensitive you build a barrier about yourself. People are
> afraid to talk to you for fear they may hurt your feelings. They must be
> forever on guard. They do not feel comfortable in your company.
>
> Tear down this barrier! Don't go about with the injured air of martyr.
> People may sympathize with you, but they will not welcome you and be
> glad to see you. If you see two persons talking together, don't be sure
> that they are discussing you. They are not. Don't imagine that you are
> the center of observation, that people are criticizing you, that every
> careless remark is meant as a personal affront.
>
> It is selfish, this sensitiveness. It reveals sooner than anything else
> that you are bound up in your own little world, that you are not
> interested in things outside of yourself. The way to overcome it is to
> mingle freely with people and to be as impersonal as you possibly can.
> Do not brood over simple remarks and magnify them in your mind. Refuse
> to accept an affront. Force yourself to overlook the trifles that you
> are inclined to take so seriously."

Enough for a Lifetime

2006-08-24T12:01:00.000+10:00

I was reading an email I sent everyone on my last day of work in 2004 (I resigned twice from the same company), and I forwarded them this message which I thought was a very meaningful one. No matter how many times I've read it, and you've probably read it too, the meaning still holds true. 'Enough' is enough for a lifetime.

"Recently, a Mother and her daughter were overheard in their last moments together at a regional airport. They had announced her departure and standing near the security gate, they hugged and she said, "I love you. I wish you enough." She in turn said, "Mom, our life together has been more than enough. Your love is all I ever needed. I wish you enough, too, Mom." They kissed and she left.

She walked over toward the window where I was seated. Standing there, I could see she wanted and needed to cry. I tried not to intrude on her privacy, but she welcomed me in by asking, "Did you ever say good-bye to someone knowing it would be forever?"

"Yes, I have," I replied.

"Forgive me for asking, but why is this a forever good-bye?" I asked. "I am old and she lives much too far away. I have challenges ahead and the reality is, the next trip back will be for my funeral," she said.

"When you were saying good-bye I heard you say, "I wish you enough." May I ask what that means?"

She began to smile. "That's a wish that has been handed down from other generations. My parents used to say it to everyone." She paused for a moment and looked up as if trying to remember it in detail, she smiled even more.

"When we said 'I wish you enough,' we were wanting the other person to have a life filled with just enough good things to sustain them," she continued. Then, turning toward me, she shared the following as if she were reciting it from memory.

I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright.

I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun more.

I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive.

I wish you enough pain so that the smallest joys in life appear much bigger.

I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.

I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.

I wish you enough hellos to get you through the final good-bye."

She then began to sob and walked away."

Wake Me Up When September Ends

2006-08-21T23:38:00.000+10:00

It's almost September.

Did someone hit the fast forward button?

Unbelievable.

It never stops. Or slows down. Most of all, it sweeps you off your feet when you're looking the other way.

I have a brother who's getting married this month. I ought to be there. But I'm here.

I have friends who are getting married. I ought to be there. But I'm here.

There's a baby popping out into the world, having her first breath, giving her first cry. I ought to be there. But I'm here.

My monkeys are growing up having birthdays and I ought to be there. But I'm here.

Am I missing out in life? Am I the missing jig saw in somebody's life? Am I living life the fullest when I'm not in the view?

I ought to be here because I'm here.

Perth: From Rags to Riches

2006-08-16T14:23:00.000+10:00

"Perth is now the 2nd most expensive city after Sydney. Sleepy town Perth property market has been soaring thanks to its mining and migrant activity."
Four days in Perth and those words were buzzing ALOT - pretty much like its flies in summer. Weather was mild, nothing as cold as Melbourne (so it was a very pleasant winter for me). People, as friendly as a flock of lambs, no wait, that's the simile for gentle. I met good people everywhere. Warning: Adult women are prone to Big Hugs and Big Smiles. Might Tickle occasionally too.
So yes, Perth left me with a very beautiful impression. Is it a place I want to visit again? Yea probably. I didn't get to see much this time because I was too focussed on other matters. But I'll say this: It has the greatest, most incredible, most fantastic, 'once-you-chew-you-can't-stop' apple strudel in the world. Go To: Corica, Nth Bridge, Perth. Damn good.

Tip of the Lifeberg

2006-08-04T16:24:00.000+10:00

If you had to give an advice to a younger person about Life, what would it be?

NooNiaN said...
"Life...is like a box of...cikulet...."

Nadhirah said...
"Life is not always fair. Kill yourself or get over it."

kid said...
"Life is like a game... it can be over any time."

Nadhirah said...
"You start dying the day you are born."

Chunky Munky said...
"There's a difference between dreaming and pretending."

GiLLieBeaN said...
"Life is all about growing up ... and growing sideways."

City with a View

2006-08-04T16:03:00.000+10:00

Sneak Peek

2006-08-04T16:02:00.000+10:00

Over lunch, I read some interesting snippets in mXnews that had me very entertained. So if you're having a down Friday (for whatever reason), hope you'll cheer up after this.

Story #1
HEADLINE: Oh Bollocks, This Makes Me Testy
A CROATIAN man got a nasty surprise when he tried to get out of his deck chair and found his testicles were stuck. Mario Visnjic went swimming naked in the sea at the Valalta beach in western Croatia.
His testicles shrank while in the cool sea and slipped through the slats when he sat on his wooden deckchair. But as he lay in the sun they expanded back to normal size and got stuck between the slats. He was freed after he called beach maintenance services on his mobile phone and staff cut the deck chair in half.

Story #2
HEADLINE: Bummer
A US fire station had to close yesterday after it became infested with felas. The station house, in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, was overrun after hundreds of fleas latched on a crew answering a call to a condemned home. They sprayed the station down with pesticide but had to call an exterminator to get rid of them, spokesman Brian O' Connor said.

Story #3:
HEADLINE: Punchy End to Freedom
Two Italian prisoners released under a national pardon celebrated freedom with such gusto in a bar they were back inside within five hours.
Freed from Macomer jail on Sardinia to relieve prison overcrowding, Massimiliano Formula, 32 and Raimondo Muntoni, 28, were arrested for punching police.

Story #4:
HEADLINE: Urine Real Trouble Now
There was a comedy, and there were toilets, but any humour was purely unintentional.
An Indian film crew shooting Keep At It, Munnabhai ran into trouble when filming in a snazzy blue-and-white tiled toilet in a popular suburban mall.
The problem: automatically flushing urinals.
"At one point, with so many unit members inside the loo, all the flush sensors went berzerk and started flushing simultaneously," director Raju Hirani said.

Picture Perfect

2006-07-12T01:18:00.000+10:00

There will not be pictures.

Not for the next few weeks anyway.

No, nothing's wrong with the camera.

It's really the photographer I think.

She's gone irresponsibly mad.

Can't be bothered, y'know.

She does apologise for not keeping up to standards.

But she says, 'Oh bugger it, i'm just going to sit in and enjoy the view on this one.'

Sorry crowd.

Really am.

Can't do much when she's in that spirit.

The Power of Now

2006-07-07T17:25:00.001+10:00

Many of you are probably wondering what I'm up to these days.

To some unsuspecting few, you might think I'm still scaring the beejeezuz out of my monkees. But fact is, I've diverted my attention to Melbourne grounds. Little Melbourne children are sweetcakes. See how their blue eyes bulge in fear. So cute.

I'm about to make a public announcement on my blog
(which no one reads - it may be futile but try, I will nevertheless.). If you see me online, please do not ask me this question:
"Have you found a job yet?"

I will get deeply, horrendously, skin-itchingly, hair-raisingly annoyed. Because for pete's sake people (whoever Pete is), I've only been here for a week. Is there nothing else in life than to work, work and work? And if you're answer is 'no', you are sickly, grossly, overworked and dull to no end.

Let me tell you monkeys, gorillas and chimps.

Some days you've got to sit back, smell the roses, and enjoy the coffee. Some days you just need to bask in the sun and appreciate life.

Because if one day a truck would to run me over and I'm lying there dying, squished and squashed, I will want to have memories of flowers, of green grass, juicy strawberries and blue skies. And if I met God (for I have not sinned that much), I can say, "Thank you dear Lord for bringing us so much joy in our lives. Thank you for giving us such a beautiful world. Thank you for giving us sun to melt the cold, the birds to chirp a song, and for family&friends to warm our hearts."

The only way for me to be thankful is to take Time and Be in the Now.

Let us all appreciate the Now. Not on our death beds. (I only write so much about it because it will come. Sooner or later). God knows work can wait.

2006-06-09T02:30:00.000+10:00

Hope Dreams Thoughts
Singapore, 2006

2006-06-09T02:27:00.000+10:00

Box Lady
Singapore, 2006

2006-06-09T02:23:00.000+10:00

Splish! Splash!
Singapore, 2006

2006-06-09T02:22:00.000+10:00

Nailin' It
Singapore, 2006

2006-06-09T02:21:00.000+10:00

Rub the Tub
Singapore, 2006

Sri Mariamman Temple

2006-06-07T15:02:00.000+10:00

"As you enter the gates of the temple, look up at the gopuram or the tower over the entrance of the temple. Covered with figurative sculptures of gods and goddesses and mythological beasts, this tower is visible from afar so devotees can even say their prayers without stepping inside the temple. Notice strings of fresh mango and coconut leaves hanging above temple doors - they are signs of welcome and purity.

As with all Hindu temples, certain rituals have to be observed. Remove your shoes before you enter. At the door, devotees ask God to grant their requests by ringing the bells before entering. They also purify themselves by washing their hands and feet, and sprinkling water on their heads. Near the door, look out for the aluminium enclosure into which devotees break coconuts as a symbol of breaking their egos to reveal their pure and kind inner-selves.

Within the temple compound, walk in a clock-wise direction and only encircle the temple hall an odd number of times as a sign of good luck. Look out for the offerings of bananas (symbol of abundance), mangoes and even saris for the goddesses at the shrine. The lotus, a symbol of human life to the Hindus, is frequently used as a decorative motif."

(Excerpt from Singapore Tourism)

Dewa
Singapore, 2006

2006-06-07T14:57:00.001+10:00

Battle Horse
Singapore, 2006

2006-06-07T14:57:00.000+10:00

Gods
Singapore, 2006

2006-06-07T14:56:00.000+10:00

Guardian
Singapore, 2006

2006-06-07T14:55:00.001+10:00

Blessings
Singapore, 2006

2006-06-07T14:55:00.000+10:00

Gorgeous
Singapore, 2006

2006-06-06T19:59:00.000+10:00

Poppies
Singapore, 2006

2006-06-06T19:58:00.000+10:00

Sunshine
Singapore, 2006

2006-06-06T19:57:00.000+10:00

Church
Singapore, 2006

2006-06-06T19:26:00.000+10:00

Airy Laundry
Singapore, 2006

2006-06-06T19:23:00.000+10:00

Pigeon
Singapore, 2006

2006-06-06T00:35:00.000+10:00

Windows
Singapore, 2006

2006-06-06T00:31:00.000+10:00

Windows
Singapore, 2006

Tragedy in Yogya

2006-05-28T00:55:00.000+10:00

Dear God, I hope the people we met in Yogya are alright. :(

Earthquake kills more than 2,500 in Indonesia

2006-05-14T22:52:00.000+10:00

Open house! Guess in which area? Red district lor... where else? Only in Singapore. :P
Singapore, 2005

2006-05-14T22:51:00.000+10:00

Blaphemous! Seventeen a pub? Golly... only in Singapore. Nyek Nyek.
Singapore, 2005

Midnight Beauty

2006-05-10T00:26:00.000+10:00

Mom's thorny night bloomer. Apparently cactus' have a habit of flowering at night. A little shy I think.Such rare modesty.
somewhere in this life

heaven on earth

2006-05-09T00:40:00.000+10:00

mitologi
somewhere in this life

2006-05-09T00:37:00.000+10:00

legenda
somewhere in this life

2006-05-09T00:36:00.000+10:00

di kayangan
somewhere in this life

flipping the pages

2006-05-07T16:33:00.000+10:00

"Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it?

It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up.

You build up all these defences, you build up a whole suit of armour, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...

You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore.
Love takes hostage. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into you heart.

It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-in-side-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love."

---- by English-born American novelist, screenwriter and author, Neil Gaiman.

My sentiments precisely.

Mind Bulb

2006-05-07T03:23:00.000+10:00

Short Quote: Abraham states it, "if you ignore a problem, don't worry, it will [only] get worse" and then you won't be able to ignore it any longer.

and she rode into the sunset...

2006-05-07T01:33:00.001+10:00

Closing Time
Putrajaya, Malaysia, 2006

pooble is the colour

2006-05-07T01:33:00.000+10:00

Purple Sky
Putrajaya, Malaysia, 2006

Karma

2006-05-07T01:30:00.000+10:00

[CAUTION: This story has an extremely deep end. The writer does not insure readers from falling and hence, getting lost in it. She bids you good luck.]

In a little village, just like any other little village, lived a little girl named Karma. Karma was a beautiful girl. She had two very big brown curious eyes, white teeth that shone like stars when she smiled and long shiny ebony black hair that her mother would tie in two pigtails. Yes, Karma was a very beautiful girl indeed. And in all her life, Karma lived in the village called Samsara.

On the day of her birth, a wise man foretold that Karma would one day become a significant figure. Everyone thought she would grow up to be Miss Universe. Every girl wanted to be Miss Universe. After all, didn’t it mean you could rule the whole universe by just the wave of your hand?

Charming as Samsara was, it begin to have its share of problems. One day, Mara, a neighbouring village witch doctor came to Samsara. He was a powerful man who craved control over every man, woman and child. He was an evil man and he drew fear the moment he set his glowering red stare upon your face. No one could banish him. No body dared to. He was too scary. And so he became untouchable and almost invisible. Emboldened by fear, Mara kept the villagers under a spell. He drew a white circle around the village so no one could ever leave Samsara. Everyone called it the Cycle of Samsara or, the cycle of Suffering, because once you start running from one point of Samsara, you’d only end up where you begun. It seemed like there was no way out.

Mara used various tools of torture on anyone who tried to escape. He tempted the greedy; he angered the proud; he brought sorrow to the lonely. Many gave up and succumbed to Mara. Mara became more and more cruel, more and more ugly and more and more scary.

Soon people forgot this child called Karma. She was ignored and she was forgotten. People were so absorbed in their own fears, no one cared to understand the prophesy: Karma was to be a significant figure. Who cared? Who bothered?

Karma was the key to the chain of events. Literally. She was born with a key in her heart. That key could open any door in the world. It could unlock the butcher’s house, the central bank, the state library and even magical circles that no one could escape.

In order for anyone to get the key, a series of rites had to be performed. Complicated, elaborated twirls and turns that took magnanimous amount of effort. It could take, not weeks, not months, not even years, but lifetimes, to perfect it!

Sadly, there is no end to this story because, at the time of print, Karma’s secret key remains... a secret.

Ancient folks talked about it. Parents’ of the parent’s of their parents’ talked about it. But no one did anything but talked. Simply because, talk is cheap and it was way too difficult to achieve. Lifetimes! How incredulous! Lifetimes! They would rather rot. Lifetimes! They preferred to stick with Mara.

Ajahn Brahm once said: ‘We have the freedom to leave any thing, any time we want.’

If only, yes, if only we knew that the doors of hell is always open. If only we understood that we have the freedom to walk out of hell whenever we wanted to, we could be in heaven right now.

[P.S.: I told you so.]

Here's some psycho analaysia on the characters' & place name: MableTV: Glossary

Stream Winner
Putrajaya, Malaysia 2006

Drink and Be

2006-04-29T21:45:00.000+10:00

One should always be drunk.
That's all there is to it; it's the only way.
Not to feel the horrible burden of Time
That breaks your back and bends you to the earth,
You should be continually drunk.

Drunk with what?
With passion, with anger, with outrage or with justice, as you please.
But get drunk.

And if sometimes you should happen to awake,
On the stairs of a palace, on the green grass of a ditch, in the dreary solitude of your own room, and find that your drunkenness is ebbing or has vanished,
Ask the wind and the wave, ask the star, bird, or clock, ask everything that flies, everything that moans, everything that flows, everything that sings, everything that speaks,
Ask them the time; and the wind, the wave, the star, the bird and the clock will all reply:
'It is Time to get drunk! If you are not to be the martyred slaves of Time, be perpetually drunk!
With passion, with anger, with outrage or with justice, as you please.'

'Be Drunk' by Charles Baudelaire - 19th century French Poet.

Life is a Net and Then You Tangle

2006-04-29T20:44:00.000+10:00

A few weeks back, me mates and I re-lived our youth with a trip down to Pulau Ketam.

Back when we were fresh fishies, we took a wrong turn and ended up in Port Klang. It was to be the best mistake made. There you have four giddy clueless monkees in a speedboat to a new plank-ful world. Sea breeze in our hair, hot sun on our young flushed cheeks, we gorged our bellies silly with seafood, fried ice cream and laughter. For six years, it was our selfish little secret.

Until recently only did I return with the original two giddy monkees, this time accompanied by two... uhm... etchi oyajijis. One of the monkees married and lived happily ever after. Too blissful in marriage to catch a breath of nostalgia. I don't blame her. Parcel of life. Some monkees swing, linger and go back. Others, fly, swing and never do.

Nevertheless, me mates and I had a ball. Adventurous ang mohs can tell you that Pulau Ketam is great for cheap beer, fancy keropok and fantastic 'lala chien'. 'How about the crabs, fresh fish and the rubbery squids,' you say? Ask the ang mohs and they will boast to you that the seafood is top notch. Ask the locals and they will say... 'inflation lar brader'. *sigh* Spoil market di.

But go, you must. Nay, not must, but, most definitely. Pulau Ketam is a charming fishing village that's worth at least one Saturday. This picturesque wonder is a peaceful floating kampung that reminds you of the old days - where strangers smile at one another, where life can be simply uncomplicated and where friendships last infinitely. Where you can sit down under a sweet shade with some old mates while you bite into your fried ice cream in comfortable silence.

Go, you must.

Life is a net & then you tangle
Pulau Ketam, Selangor 2006

2006-04-29T20:43:00.001+10:00

net mounts
Pulau Ketam, Selangor 2006

2006-04-29T20:42:00.000+10:00

go fish
Pulau Ketam, Selangor 2006

2006-04-29T20:41:00.002+10:00

for a photo with a photo to a photo
Pulau Ketam, Selangor 2006

2006-04-29T20:41:00.001+10:00

floataway
Pulau Ketam, Selangor 2006

2006-04-29T20:41:00.000+10:00

in the clouds
Pulau Ketam, Selangor 2006

2006-04-29T20:40:00.000+10:00

plank you
Pulau Ketam, Selangor 2006

2006-04-29T20:39:00.001+10:00

fences
Pulau Ketam, Selangor 2006

2006-04-29T20:39:00.000+10:00

stained
Pulau Ketam, Selangor 2006

2006-04-29T20:38:00.003+10:00

shadows
Pulau Ketam, Selangor 2006